And now a late-breaking A to Z news report:
Dying blogger giving away 100 dollars, people laugh like crazy
Mumbai: In an interesting development, a broke amateur blogger who lost his job thanks to the April AtoZ challenge, has decided to give away his last 100 dollars through a blogging contest. The announcement sent shockwaves of amusement throughout the blogging community, with incidents of laughter induced hernia and vomiting reported from all over the world.
Our agency was among the first to report the tragic loss of Akhil’s job when he was caught writing articles for the AtoZ challenge during office hours. The blogging community, crossing borders and cutting lines, had strongly supported him and his right to get the load off his head. This time though, the reaction is completely opposite.
Vaisakh, a blogger from India, tried his best to talk to us over the phone. However his incessant, breathless laughter rendered all his words inaudible. After half an hour of effort, he finally caught some air and said:
“I’ve known that guy from the first day he started writing. I really liked his incoherent, thoughtless banter, made me feel really good about my own writing. But then tragedy struck and he was thrown out of his job. People really sympathised with him you know, but sympathy doesn’t pay the bills, does it? I can’t believe he is stupid enough to give away his last penny, that too through a blogging contest! I mean do you see the irony here? One challenge took away his job, the other one is gonna take away his life! He has really outshined Peter Griffin I tell you.”
We caught up with his fellow blogger Ayush Chauhan at a cheap liquor joint just outside of town. Sticking a dirty needle up his left arm, he talked about the good times and how it all went down the drain so quickly:
“We were 2 broke IT guys. Then we were 2 broke IT guys who blogged. Our dreams of making thousands of dollars online were brutally shattered when he got fired. Ever since then, he has been begging me for some money, but you can see how things are. I’m glad he is getting it over with. That poor bastard never knew what hit him. May he rest in peace.”
When last seen, Akhil was living in a cardboard box just outside of Vashi station. He appeared frail and delusional, and kept muttering something about the Govt. taking away his home. Our reporters managed to get some fluids inside him, giving him the energy to speak:
“Sure, I lost my job due to the AtoZ, but it inspired me to write. I finally got a place to put my endless thoughts to rest. This is my tribute to my blogging friends, my death will spawn 100 new articles and those 100 will give birth to 10000! Money is so overrated I tell you, and eternal glory costs only 100 dollars. I invite you to share this glory with me.”
The situation continues to be grim but excruciatingly funny.
Okay so the article is not totally real, but the contest part is. For more information check out 1 Hundred Works.